i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
