so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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