You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
