Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It was like giving head to a cactus.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize