Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I know her cup size but not her name....
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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