i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Randomize
