I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
