After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
