we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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