In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
