Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize