party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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