What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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