i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize
