you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
When did angry sex become our thing?
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
