the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
So vagazzling was a success
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