your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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