I hope mine doesn't look like that
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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