did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
