just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize