If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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