Duck Duck Cougar?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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