i think i have herpe
just one?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize