im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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