Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
