She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
