How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
