Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize