im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize