so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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