Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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