Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Farmville is her only friend.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
His hands were made for my vagina.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
