dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
