How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
