sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
