as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
