I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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