the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
