I skipped work to stalk him.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize