With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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