Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
