It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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