So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize