I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize