There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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