he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
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