either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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