the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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