we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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