the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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